


From Paris With Love.

by LadyByron



Category: Eroica Yori Ai o Komete | From Eroica with Love, Lupin III
Genre: Angst, Canon-Typical Violence, Conflict, Crossover, Drama & Romance, Duelling, Goemon being a drama queen, I don't know what will happen next, Jealousy, Jigen being saucy and Eroica being a slut. Klaus being Klaus., Love Triangles, M/M, Making Out, The major being a dummy, You know him, he is mean, so i don't know how to tag.
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-27
Updated: 2020-03-27
Packaged: 2021-03-01 04:02:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 12,822
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23345182
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyByron/pseuds/LadyByron
Summary: Goemon cannot stop thinking about Eroica. Jigen arranges a meeting. But it doesn't go that well.
Relationships: Dorian Red Gloria/Ishikawa Goemon XIII, Dorian Red Gloria/Jigen Daisuke, Ishikawa Goemon XIII/Jigen Daisuke, Klaus von dem Eberbach/Dorian Red Gloria, Many many many ships, i can't say
Comments: 8
Kudos: 9





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> You MUST read my fanfic "The Robbery" before this.

Meditation wasn't helping. Nor was training extra hours. Nor drinking until passing out, which was something he hated doing. 

But he hated the weird feeling more, so he searched all options he had to make it numb or at least mild.

Those lips... The soft and peculiar scent of roses and musk. The golden curls.

He was going insane, no doubt. He was having strange feelings a man should not have for another man.

Alright, he admired his partners and would die and kill for them. But this was different. He wanted to kiss those lips more. He wanted to run his hands through that man'shair, and caress that face more. He barely could touch the soft skin before Lupin interrupted them. 

Did he fall in love with Eroica?

No. How could he? He didn't know the Ear!

He lusted after him. How filthy.

He tried to get rid of the feeling over and over. But it was not working. No use. 

"Jigen", he asked one afternoon.

"Say", the bearded man said quickly.

Jigen was aware of Goemon's strange behaviour, but didn't have the guts to ask. Either way, he felt the samurai wouldn't really speak at all. So when the he approached, he answered a bit too fast.

"Do you know the real name of Eroica?", Goemon asked and turned red with embarrassment. But he was determined to find out whatever he needed to find out, despite the dishonour and shame.

"Huh... Dorian Gray?", Jigen replied, scratching his beard. He knew the real name but for some reason he thought about lying.

"That's Oscar Wilde's character. His name is Dorian Red. He is the Earl of Gloria, Goemon. We talked about it", Lupin interrupted. He was a pro at butting in.

"Yes", Goemon nodded. But he didn't care before, "do you, by any chance, happen to know his whereabouts?"

"Why you wanna know?", Jigen looked at him, half hiding his face under the hat.

"... That is my business. Not yours", he blushed even more, and even more when Lupin giggled.

"London. He lives in a castle. Like a princess, Goemon...", Lupin bit his tongue, looking at the samurai with a smug grin.

The young man squinted and walked away, offended. Whatever Lupin was implying or suspecting was plain rude. Probably based on actual facts, but rude nonetheless.

For the time being, they were living in Paris. They crossed the channel the moment they stole the sculpture. So it was a matter of just crossing the channel again. And yet, he couldn't. He couldn't at all...

Oh, but when things are meant to happen... They happen.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Oh, the cheek of him!", Lord Gloria exclaimed, looking at his friend, driver, everything, Mr. Bonham. "You know where Lupin the third is and you don't help the Interpol?".

"'S not my jurisdiction", the Major shrugged and lit a cigarette, "besides, that butt-chin grandpa chasing the Frenchie is annoying as crap. He yells all the time".

"Ah, well, I assume you never yell. Hypocrite", Dorian rolled his eyes.

"...", the Major ignored him. "so, my Lord..."

Oh... 

When Klaus was being so nice like this, he surely had a hidden agenda. Dorian smiled and played with his hair, raising an eyebrow.

"Suppose I tell you where he is now... Will you go... And will you allow me to finish my mission without interfering?", the Major asked, pointing at him with the cigarette.

"Of course, darling. Whenever have I lied to you?", the Earl smiled politely, twirling a curl around his finger, and Klaus smiled an equally fake smile.

"Always. You always do, heh", he scoffed. "Lemme see...", he picked up some files and proceeded to read, frowning and humming, "So... He... Is in Paris, at the moment. He's been seen over there. No one exactly knows where, naturally".

"Paris is much better than the whole world. I know now where to start. Thank you, Major", Eroica almost bowed.

"Hmph".

But before Eroica left the room, the Major cleared his throat.

"Earl".

"Major?", the thief turned like a model in the catwalk and Klaus growled, annoyed.

"Is it just for the sculpture? Or you're after... Something else?", the brunette Major asked, squinting.

What do you care, what do you care, what do you care... Dorian knew the Major oh too well, and he knew he was suspecting something.

"The sculpture, Major. Nothing but the sculpture", even though Klaus had no right to mess with his love affairs, Dorian was too discrete this time.

"...", just more squinting of those green eyes, no words. Dorian then just grinned.

"Well... From Eroica with love, Major, goo-"

"Have you seen him? He's ugly. Looks like a monkey", Klaus commented casually.

What was this strange attitude from him?

"Oh, worry not. I do not have any interest in him...", the Earl couldn't help but laugh softly.

"Just letting you know... Now, be off".

"... Major?"

"What".

"Does he, by any chance, work with a samurai?", the innocence of his voice and face were meritorious of an award to the best actor.

Klaus looked up at him, with a cold glance.

"Yes..."

"Is he very pretty?", Dorian giggled. What about the Major? Had the Earl not known him perfectly he would have thought he was jealous.

"How the fuck am I suppose to know that?"

Dorian chuckled and greeted the Major again. He left Bonn to Paris, determined to find his beautiful Asian youth.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jigen was marching down the streets of Paris, just strolling down alone. Goemon had disappeared somewhere to train and Lupin was just studying some security system.

He was a bit worried about his pal, Goemon. It was clear there was something about Eroica the thief annoying him. Could it be that in such a short amount of time, the English guy managed to seduce him? A man like Goemon?

But another explanation, he couldn't find. And as much as he didn't like it, it was worse to see his friend so depressed so... He was already considering looking for the Earl himself.

There was a lot to analyse. He personally didn't approve of the idea of messing with men... It wasn't... It had a bad reputation. On the other hand, he supposed that if there was no remedy, well... A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do. Also, if the legends were true, Eroica was a beauty from head to toe so an innocent dumb ass like Goemon could have fallen for him easily.

And there was... Like a slight hint of jealousy. He didn't like the idea of... Goemon liking someone. He was easy to charm because he was... Naïve. But usually it was a matter of two, three days until he managed to 'empty his mind' and start all over. This time it looked like it was going to be tough. For some reason, having Goemon in love with someone else... With someone! Not someone else, it was not a nice thought to him. Bah...

Who cared. All he wanted was for Goemon to be happy. Always with that angry expression, like a grumpy old cat. Spikey like cacti. Cold as shit. If he could just help Goemon to cheer up, and smile a bit... Maybe he'd be grateful and surely Jigen would feel better if Goemon felt better.

Yes, who cared about his own feelings? Goemon's well being mattered the most.

He was thinking all of this when suddenly, a whining kid caught his attention. Looked like a kid and his two parents, an old short dude and the mother was like a model. Funny looking people. But the mother was too pretty for the father... Ah, it was another dude. Three dudes. And...

One of them was Eroica. 

Was he? The kid kept whining, speaking about all the money they spent.

"Cut it out, James, dear. I am running out of patience", he heard the blonde guy saying, with a voice that was forcibly sweet but he looked clearly agitated.

"But my lord!", the kid was crying.

Lord... It was Eroica. What was he doing here?

"All for your lascivious obsession with that samuraaaaaaaai!!!!", the kid yelled and Eroica started rubbing his temples.

Well, that explained.

Jigen walked closer. It was easy, since people were escaping the loud noise. As he approached, the kid... That was a little man, in the end, not a kid, hid behind the Earl and the Earl turned to see the cause of his little boy's fear. 

Okay, he was a scruffy looking gunman yes. But hey, was he so scary? The blonde turned pale and stepped in front of his two men, protectively, the moment he saw him.

"Excuse my indiscretion", Jigen said, anyways, when he was closer, "but are you Lord Gloria?".

The Earl was surprised. Who was this man and how did he know about him? He thought the man looked like a proper mafia man, a murderer, but he sounded interesting. Low, deep mumbling voice. A nice body shape. Strong jaw, clearly, under the beard. He seemed all right. Yet, he gulped when he noticed the shape of a gun... A gun just like the Major's. Hah! He smiled and nodded.

"Well, I am, indeed. Who are you?", he asked politely.

"They call me Jigen. I work with Lupin the third...".

Jigen almost chuckled at Eroica's face. His eyes widened and he grinned. Surely not for Lupin. His cheeks turned a bit red and he blinked, batting those impossibly long eyelashes.

Ah, he was... He was handsome, like the legends said...

"Oh, well... I was... I happened to be looking for one of his partners...", Eroica confessed, shyly.

"Goemon?", Jigen slid his hand in his pocket and took out his box of cigarettes. He lit one and politely offered one to the blonde thief, who just as politely rejected it with an elegant gesture, "he is looking for you. I wonder why...", he looked at Dorian from under his hat.

"Ah, we... We met and we shared a minimal conversation about hm, wakashu... Age and some things", he closed his eyes while lying shamelessly.

"Ah, right. Right, yes, I bet ya did...", he snorted and took his hat off.

Dorian smiled. The man looked scary, yes, but he had kind, pretty, dark eyes. The nose was long and his mouth was quite big for his face but it fitted nicely. He wasn't what one would say, "beautiful". He was simply strangely attractive. The beard was long but he didn't give the impression of being dirty. On the contrary, he looked as if he forcefully tried a scruffy appearance but with dedication. He had a nice smirk too, and the way he smoked was quite sensual. 

"Heh...", he chuckled, playing with his hair, "do you know Goemon?"

"I do. Want me to guide you to him?", he mumbled, cigarette between his lips.

"M'lord...", Bonham whispered, a bit scared.

"I will go alone, Bonham", Dorian said, determined.

"Nooo! He will murder you! He will molest you, kill you and throw your body in the Seine!", the short man started crying again. Only one eye was visible since the other was hidden behind thick locks of dark hair.

"Nah, I won't molest anyone. I'm not that type", Jigen reassured him, "the other half, well, that depends on how much he has in his wallet".

Dorian smiled widely at the joke but he winced when his accountant Mr. James cried louder.

"My looooooooord, give me your walleeeeeeeeeeeeeet!", he yelled, clinging onto the thief's vest.

And so he did. Dorian handed him his wallet and asked Bonham to trust him. 

"Follow us, in the car, and remember the address. Come look for me in say, an hour, or an hour and a half", he said.

"Will just an hour and a half be enough for you? Oh Earl, you're so lecherous!", Mr. James kept crying and Jigen hid his face more under his hat.

Dorian ignored him and went on.

"I will just greet him and arrange a proper meeting. Do trust me, Bonham. My senses do not fail me. Mister Jigen does look trustworthy enough".

Bonham didn't look so sure, but "Mister Jigen" blushed. Did he look trustworthy?

And so, Eroica walked with Jigen back to the apartment where he was staying, along with Goemon and Lupin, apparently. 

Every now and then, the car with the two weird men that came with the Earl passed by. Jigen didn't mind. He knew there were certain codes between thieves and Eroica wouldn't betray those.

"So, Jigen", Dorian asked, "was Goemon looking for me?"

"Yeah. He asked about you and how to find you. That's not him at all, so I guess there's something troubling him", Jigen answered, smoking slowly.

"I see... Well, I'm happy to know that. To be honest with you, I have been thinking about him a lot myself. And that's why I'm here".

"How did you find out that we were here?", Jigen looked at him, a bit shocked.

"I have someone who knows way too much. But worry not... You're... Not his jurisdiction", he imitated the Major's voice perfectly and Jigen looked at him surprised.

"Right. That NATO man, yes?", the bearded man smiled a bit. He knew a lot himself too.

"... How... Would you know that?", the Earl felt more and more curious about this gang, particularly this man now.

Jigen shrugged. "You gotta know your opponents".

"Even the Major?", Dorian raised an eyebrow.

"Oh yeah. Isn't he your lover?"

And then Dorian laughed. Like... Golden bells and sparks. Jigen had to look. The force Eroica made to laugh made his cheeks blush and his hair was agitated by the bobbing of his head. His cheeks had cute dimples, the left cheek's dimple was deeper than the right one and his teeth were perfect.

This man was going to cause trouble.

"He's not?", he asked, lifting his hat a bit to uncover his eyes.

"Oh, he is not, sadly. I wish he were", Eroica replied, still amused.

"What was so funny?", Jigen squinted.

"Ah... It's just... Boy, how bad would your destiny be if the Major ever finds out you called him my lover", the blonde tapped Jigen's arm casually.

"Tssk! As if I would ever allow a long haired baby boy threaten me", he looked so confident that Dorian couldn't help but bite his lip.

"Oh, do not underestimate him. The man is a tank rather than a human. He's survived so much. Should you fight him, he would get you down", he had to protest for his Major's honour.

The car passed by again and Jigen kept quiet until it was far away once again. Then he just grabbed Eroica by his arm, pushed him against a wall and pointed at him with his gun, through the jacket.

Dorian yelped, shocked, and lifted his hands protectively, but he looked around and for some reason, there was not a single soul around. What was this twist?

"I guess you never really heard about Jigen Daisuke, did ya, Goldilocks?", the bearded man asked, closer than ever and Dorian discovered he smelled of tobacco and of expensive perfume, which almost made him laugh. Oh, yes. He was pure pretence. But surely, fast. So he shouldn't be underestimated either.

"I'm afraid not... Is that your gun? Or are you just happy to see me?", he was scared yes. But he wasn't a coward. So he looked at Jigen and smiled, a cheeky grin spreading on his face. He wasn't really surprised that the man smiled back.

"My gun. Trust me, if it were the other thing, you'd be actually pretty scared".

Dorian closed his eyes and laughed loud again. Jigen chuckled too and let him go. It was then when Eroica noticed how hard he was being pressed against the wall, because his ribcage hurt a bit. Wow... He was... Strong. 

"Alright, alright. Between you and the Major, there would be a very intense battle", he admitted. "But I will have to cheer for him, I'm afraid".

"That's fine by me. Hope you'll be there for him to pick up what's left of him", Jigen covered his eyes with the hat again, and scoffed.

"Oh, yes. It wouldn't be the first time...", he smiled and kept walking with him. Hmm... This Jigen was quite a man.

Just when they were about to arrive, the Earl cleared his throat.

"Women are hideous, are they not?", he said, out of the blue, but Jigen could feel his huge eyes checking on him discreetly. The bastard had a good nose, right?

"Yeah...", Jigen mumbled and opened the door of the apartment, "I hate them".

Dorian smiled and bit his lip, not to say a thing. Mh... This Jigen, with his dark hair, his toughness, his smoking style, the Magnum there and his hate for women, hmm... He was quite a man indeed.


	2. Part II

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eroica can't help being the seductive beauty he is. 
> 
> Goemon finds his bold, needy side.
> 
> And Jigen... Jigen can't help noticing how handsome the Earl is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did you know Eroica's adoration, Major Klaus, has long dark hair, smokes a lot and carries a Magnum, just like Jigen Daisuke?
> 
> I think if you don't, you should know O_o

His legs felt heavy. He was so tired that he could barely move. And all for nothing. He kept thinking about him.

It was decided then. He'd look for Eroica, open up, and succumb to his desires. He could be unified to him by sincere bonds of love, eventually, if he taught the philanderer thief values and life lessons to make him a more decent person. He wouldn't entirely change his essence, he would just enhance Eroica's virtues and soothe and rectify his flaws. Goemon couldn't accept the idea of finally giving in, and mating with someone, if it wasn't going to be forever, and serious. 

Despite that his mind was finally made up, he felt heavy. He knew it wouldn't be entirely approved by his partners, and surely it seemed a bit immoral. But males could love males. It was possible. And it was his life, his own. He was adamant and he was going to do what he had to.

As he approached the door to come inside, he heard Jigen speaking. Couldn't understand the words, only the tone of his voice, which seemed quite cheerful, as if he were telling a story. The moment he was about to open the door, he heard someone else's laughter.

A laughter he knew.

He could hear his pulse in his head, 'badump, badump, badump!', and his legs felt weaker than ever. But he found strength somehow to open the door as fast as possible and enter, eyes widely opened.

There was Jigen, with a glass of whiskey in his hands, and another man was with him, in front of a half empty glass of wine, looking at him in shock.

The most beautiful man he'd ever seen. 

"Why, hello! At last we meet again!", Eroica greeted him with a smile and got up from his chair, tossing his magnificent hair back with a delicious flip and walked towards him. 

Goemon couldn't smile. He could not. He would have loved to, but he couldn't. He looked down, blushing intensely, and closed the door. 

Eroica. The man who kissed him, the man he wanted to see was finally there. 

Dorian looked at him amused, and stood right in front of him. He tilted his head, trying to find Goemon's dodging eyes.

"Hello, Goemon. I came to see you. I have heard you were looking for me", he said, softly, looking at the samurai through his thick line of long eyelashes.

Goemon looked up at him with a bit of concern. Who told him that, and why was he here anyways? He looked at Jigen who shrugged.

"You said you wanted to see him", Jigen commented casually.

"... I did so. However... How, how did you two meet?", he addressed Jigen, still too embarrassed to look at Dorian.

"Mere coincidence", Eroica replied anyways, "I happened to be here in Paris and he happened to be precisely where I was. He recognized me, wrapped me and put a ribbon on me, and voilà, here I am".

The thief had a playful tone and Jigen laughed softly. Jigen... Laughed softly. He was sitting, manspreading comfortably in his chair in the presence of an important opponent, perhaps, one who had tastes Jigen supposedly repelled. Goemon squinted. 

"Jigen, how can you bring someone here so thoughtlessly? Anonymity is our main shield", the samurai reprimanded him firmly.

How impolite, Dorian thought. He was right there being ignored and treated as a stranger, and also, as if he wasn't welcomed. He frowned and crossed his arms, offended.

Jigen noticed it. Bah. So much that Goemon whined about getting the Earl and he didn't want him now? Finally, the gunman understood why his friend was so obsessed with him, brought the thief to him, and now Goemon started getting on his high horse?

"I thought you said you wanted him", he mumbled.

"Indeed, but it was my own personal issue. I asked the minimal help I required and needed not further intromission. I don't like you acting like my matchmaker", Goemon felt his cheeks burning and he knew his tone was getting angrier.

"Alright, I've seen enough", it was Eroica, and he was angry too. He lifted his hand and closed his eyes.

"I regret being such an unwanted guest. My sincere apologies for having disturbed you both. I shall leave now", he made a soft "hmph" noise and headed to the door.

Goemon felt so idiotic. He widened his eyes and stepped in front of the door. But his gaze became as sharp as the blade of his sword when he saw Jigen getting up from his chair fast.

"W-wait, Earl...", Jigen stuttered. It was so awkward. He was having a nice time with the blode before Goemon came back.

Goemon could be so weird at times, so rude too. Who knew what was going through his head. But it wasn't Eroica's fault, and it was Jigen who brought him so he felt the urge to make it better. He walked towards Dorian but before he could give any other step he noticed how Goemon's hand was holding the Zantetsuken with strength, and his eyes looking at him with fury.

"...", Dorian froze there, a bit scared... And weirdly aroused. He was standing right between two hunks, each one with a killer weapon, and he was the cause of the little quarrel. What else could he ask for?

"Leave us alone, Jigen, please", Goemon asked and Dorian saw it could only get better.

"No... I'll stay", Jigen smirked and Dorian felt weak in the knees.

"No. I am asking you politely, please do leave us alone, Jigen. Please", it was clear that the samurai was holding back enormous amounts of anger. Who knew what he was thinking...

Jigen considered for a moment and then snorted. He pressed his hat on his head and aimed for the door.

"Sure thing. I'll be back in an hour, which is when the Earl will leave. To say goodbye", he smirked at Dorian and the latter smiled back. Goemon's eyes narrowed even more and followed Jigen until he left. 

When he was out, Goemon locked the door to prevent him from coming back. He turned, left his sword leaning against a wall, and walked towards Dorian. When he was in front of him, he finally looked up. He blushed but he looked straight into his eyes.

"Forgive my rudeness before. You were far from being unwanted. I was yearning to see you again", he spoke finally, a bit way too formally.

Dorian softened a bit and smiled.

"Ah, no hard feelings. Your friend told me you were quite perturbed. I am sorry, I didn't mean to trouble you so", he said, sweetly.

"My friend...", Goemon mumbled. "I was, indeed, perturbed. There were many things affecting me. Before you I have exercised self restraint for so long that my desires were dull and silenced. You awakened something in me. I am brave enough to face it. I was going to look for you myself. I suppose that my attitude before was just my hurt pride speaking. Forgive me...", he spoke frankly and shyly held one of Dorian's hands.

"So cute...", Eroica thought, about to swoon.

"Eroica-san, I, Goemon Ishikawa XIII, am devoted to you. I do not know you, but I would very much like to. But, I wouldn't mind acting on our primaeval desires before knowing each other...", he shut his mouth because the embarrassment was too much to handle.

Again, Dorian was taken aback. He could tell the shame affecting the samurai was insanely huge, but he still opened up honestly. Well, he was no child.

"Just like that? You're suggesting that I do it here, with you?", he smiled but with not a hint of malice or mockery, simply very sweetly and understanding.

"... ... ... ... ... I would very much like to kiss you, if I may be so bold", Goemon frowned.

"You may".

Well... Okay. He shyly lifted his face towards the Earl, and dared to look at him closely. In the daylight, he wasn't like the breathtaking apparition that approached him that night, under the warm, soft light of numerous chandeliers. He was more... Real. He could see moles and little wrinkles around his eyes, and the soft texture of his skin, that wasn't porcelain or ivory, it was real skin. This man was real. And he was going to become his. He closed his eyes and offered his mouth innocently, lips barely parted.

It made Dorian's heart ache of emotion. This boy was so sweet and adorable. It was clear he was resolved to do anything just to erase the annoying feelings within him, despite being mortified, and despite not knowing him at all. Poor darling, he had no idea apparently of Dorian's nature. He was the type that got bored so easily, and the only one he'd been religiously chasing year after year was his adored Major. But he wouldn't say that to Goemon, would he?

Instead, he cupped Goemon's face with both hands and kissed him.

The kiss was soft, innocent. Goemon tensed, but stood still. He didn't react much, other than that. Dorian felt slightly disappointed, so he grabbed Goemon's hands and placed those around him, suggesting Goemon to embrace him.

Blushing more, if possible, Goemon held onto his waist tightly. Right above the delicate curve of the hips. The Earl was a man, yes, but he was built in a way that he could pass both for a man and a girl. The waist was so narrow that Goemon's hands almost met at the back of the thief. He tried to relax. It felt nice and he really wanted this. But he couldn't stop thinking about how comfortable and even joyful Jigen looked with Eroica. It would be really inconvenient if he had laid eyes on him. Eroica was his now. His, and no other's, and if he had to fight for him, he would.

But... Of all people, Jigen? He admired and respected Jigen so much. He was closer with him than he was with Lupin. Lupin was louder and a bit superficial at times. He was so obsessed with women that it was annoying. He had tons of things that sometimes bothered Goemon, but Jigen had no apparent flaws, besides the smoking which was not so bad. Why Jigen?

Jigen was peculiar, all right. He didn't seem to have had many girlfriends, nor interest in women at all. Just randomly, seasonally. Goemon found himself thinking at times if Jigen wasn't...

But who cared. If he was. He wouldn't have minded at all. No, not at all. Not for a second, Jigen was still such a man to him. 

But if he was going to be, it couldn't be with his Eroica! Eroica was his. His alone.

Dorian didn't think so at all. He wasn't anyone's property. And surely not this boy's, who was so boringly kissing back. Dorian could even see that the man was thinking completely about something else. How... Indignant.

He pressed himself closer, wrapping his arms around Goemon's shoulders and tilted his head to deepen the kiss. He slid his tongue inside Goemon's mouth whilst his fingers got a nice fistful of his thick dark hair and pulled back a bit, gently. There was a reaction then, and he smirked against his mouth. His leg bent a bit, so his thigh could casually but firmly press against the samurai's crotch.

Alright, forget about Jigen. Goemon moaned softly and even though the tongue inside his mouth was a bit too eager, it wasn't really bad. It... Aroused him. The pressure down his loins was too much. And yet not enough. He also wrapped his arms in a more participative way around Dorian and kissed him back, as fine as he could do.

It was a matter of minutes before the kiss started to stir more sensations inside the inexperienced samurai, and he found himself kissing Dorian with more urgency and lowering him down. The thief gasped but he surrendered easily. Their linked bodies found a sofa there, and soon Goemon was atop the gorgeous blonde, kissing him with a bit more expertise and certainly with sheer lust. 

Dorian was delighted and surely didn't mind the time or space. If Goemon wanted this, he was willing to help. And if what he needed to build his confidence was to show a bit of domination -despite the trembling hands, which were impossible to dissimulate-, he'd allow it, because he was a gentleman and a gentleman was before anything else a gentle man.

His hands forced the kimono to slide down and expose the torso more. Goemon stopped kissing him to make a soft little pout. He was so timid! But he obeyed Dorian's silent commands and slid his arms off the sleeves, exposing more of himself.

He had more scars than were visible and more muscles that he could count. He was so, so beautiful and imponent there even in total stupor, that Dorian just stared. Which made Goemon blush more and more and he decided to lean down and go on kissing, because that was even less embarrassing than being looked at with such intense hunger.

Dorian moaned softly which sent shivers down Goemon's spine. It awoke even more desire in him. Was it him causing those exquisite sounds? He found boldness somewhere and he caressed the Earl's chest. It was, naturally, breastless but it was full enough to satisfy him. Even through two layers of fabric, shirt and vest, Goemon could feel a hard nipple poking there and he gulped. He rubbed it with his thumb and the blonde moaned again. Oh... Oh god...

He could do this. He was going to do this! There... In... In the apartment he shared with Jigen and Lupin. Not even in the intimacy of a bedroom.

He concluded kissing and without looking at Dorian he asked, "where is Lupin?".

"Huh?", Dorian blinked. Surely they didn't need his assistance, right?, "I believe, huh, he wasn't here when we arrived".

"I see. My Lord...", he closed his eyes and sat up, fixing his clothes again, and hiding his chest even more under the kimono, "that was all very nice, but I'm afraid I have to cut it out. Here I don't live alone, and I can't concentrate knowing we could be disturbed".

"Oh...", Dorian pouted, disappointed. And his cheeks turned slightly pink when he found his... Condition. He sat up too and elegantly crossed his legs, covering himself as fine as he could also with hands.

Goemon cleared his throat and with eyes closed and red cheeks he commented, "I'm just the same. Do not feel shame".

Dorian chuckled softly and ran a hand through his hair. "All right. But darling, I'm glad to find out you also want me. Let's meet again, please. Soon my right hand Bonham will come to pick me up, so let me please invite you to my own place. There will be privacy. I'll make sure of that".

Goemon nodded.

"Very good. I'll go to your place. Do tell me the address".

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He felt upset. Goemon had been acting like a proper idiot. Instead of thanking him, he got mad and also offended poor Eroica. 

At first, he couldn't deny it, he felt somewhat jealous that Goemon was obsessing about... Someone. But now, he felt it was helpless. Goldilocks was a piece of work. He was a sight for sore eyes. And pretty as hell. Also, extremely smart. He spoke as if he was writing a book, even describing a breakfast. The voice was soothing and calm, but he always had that hint that showed he knew he was impressive, and he just couldn't help it. 

Yeah... No wonder why Goemon got so obsessed. 

Then why would he treat him like that? If he were the interest of Eroica, which wasn't the case, he wouldn't hesitate to just swap spit with him right there and then. The blondie had a mouth that just begged for some nibbling...

"W-what the fuck am I thinking?!", he shivered and blushed, and returned to his apartment. It was time for Eroica to say goodbye.

When he arrived he had to knock on the door. It was locked and he had no key. He was surprised to see that Lord Gloria himself opened the door for him.

"Earl?", he took off his hat as he entered, "and Goemon?"

The Earl chuckled, devilish.

"He excused himself. He told me he needed to meditate. He said it wouldn't take more than ten minutes", he tapped the tip of his long nose, winking.

"Jeez... Without you?", Jigen couldn't help but laugh softly. This was the most bizarre situation ever, and he'd been through a lot of bizarre situations.

Lord Gloria shrugged, amused. "He said he wouldn't be able to do a thing with me, not under the same roof he shared with you".

"Eh? And why is that?", Jigen frowned.

"... You tell me...", Dorian purred, playing with a curl and sniffing it. Jigen gulped and felt jealous of Lord Gloria himself, who could sniff his own hair and touch himself and no one would say a thing. Goemon, who could touch him too, isolated. What a sucker.

"I... Don't know", he pursed his lips, "he is quite the shy type".

"Jigen, darling", he licked his lips, deep in thought, "am I... Interfering with something between you two? Is there an unspoken... Subject between you two?"

Wow that was... It took him by surprise.

"You mean, me and Goemon?", he opened his eyes widely, "tsssk! Nah! Man, that's... No!", he shook his head and Dorian smiled a lop-sided smile.

"Alright, alright. Just making sure", he said softly.

"Nah, I'm not... I mean... And if I were, man, he's a kid", he said and regretted it the moment he said it. What... Was that?

"You are not old yourself, are you?", the cheeky thief leaned in closer, studying his face and Jigen hated himself for blushing.

"I am. For him and you, I am", he said low, looking into the Earl's big, blue eyes.

"Oh... For me, too?", he smirked and shamelessly ran two fingers over Jigen's jaw, caressing his beard, making him shiver. 

Oh boy, Eroica was a slut.

Heh...

"Dunno, huh, you... Like old men?", Jigen smirked and stepped closer.

"Any other time, I would have said no... But...", the wicked demon petted Jigen's beard with his thumb, purring like a tamed cat, "I think I'm finding a pattern...", and then his hand went down Jigen's chest and around his ribcage, tracing the straps of his gun holster until he found the Magnum and caressed it slowly, looking at Jigen through heavy eyelids, "I love a virile man carrying a gun like this, so intrepidly".

The bearded man gulped. The Earl was so... Seductive and sensual. So shameless. Poor Goemon, though...

He licked his lips and he was considering touching the thief's hair when the door opened. They stepped away from each other and Jigen blushed more.

"There's a Bonham there looking for an Earl!", Lupin came in grinning but then squinted when he saw them. "... Am I interrupting something?"

Jigen looked at him, staggered and pressed his finger on his lips, making Lupin shut it. Lupin nodded but then pointed at his own eye, as if to say, "but I saw you", and Jigen looked down.

"Ahem...", Eroica cleared his throat, " I believe we haven't met".

"Oh waaah! We haven't! Eroica, Eroica the thief in the flesh!", Lupin bowed and the blonde bowed as well, grinning, "it is an honour to meet you, my lord!"

"The honour is absolutely mine", he offered his hand, "enchanté".

"Oh, oh hohoho!", Lupin held that hand and shook it, laughing mockingly at the way the man was constantly trying to seduce every living creature, and batted his short eyelashes.

Dorian squinted but said nothing, and turned when he heard Goemon coming out of his room, a bit flushed.

"You interrupted what, Lupin?", he said, and the three men gulped, looking at each other, searching for some confidential and tacit excuse. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do you like how this is going on?
> 
> Don't you fear a duel, swords and guns? 
> 
> Drama coming.
> 
> PS: Sorry Dorian for making you so slutty.


	3. Part III

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things start getting really tense between the boys...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry Goemon 🙏 I know you're a good boy!

"I was about to leave", the Earl said as naturally as he could, "and Jigen offered me his hand, to shake it".

"Agh, Goemon, you know me! I'm a tease! I was just trying to annoy Jigen!", Lupin said, with a calming tone.

"And you fucking did", Jigen snorted and turned away, walking towards the sofa where moments ago Goemon was making out with Eroica, and sat there.

"... Hmm...", Goemon squinted but said nothing. Slowly, and looking down, he approached Dorian and gently grabbed his arm, pulling him out of the apartment.

"G-goodbye!", the Earl managed to say before Goemon shut the door and walked him downstairs.

Lupin waved at the closed door and then turned to Jigen, whose eyes were massively opened. 

"Did you just see how he pushed him out?", Jigen asked, indignant.

"Yeah, but it's not my problem. Why are you so bothered by it?", Lupin raised an eyebrow and his partner just snorted.

"Just saying..."

"Jigen?", Lupin sat next to him, and lit a cigarette.

"What?", he didn't dare to look at him. Lupin was perceptive and smart. Dangerous.

"Seriously, did I interrupt something?"

"..."

He did. For some reason, even with Goemon there, just a wall, a door away, Jigen knew that were it not for Lupin coming in, he would have pulled Eroica in for a kiss. 

He liked Eroica, yes, no remedy. Instant crush. He didn't understand why or how it happened, but it happened. And he hated himself for it.

But he hated Goemon more, for owning him.

"... I am in trouble, Lupin...", he mumbled, after a while.

The other man just sighed deeply, huge clouds of smoke spreading in front of him.

"Yes", Lupin agreed, "you definitely are".

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I apologize for taking you out like that. It wasn't very gentle. Did I hurt you?", Goemon stopped only when they were down, in front of the entrance to the building.

"Not at all, but it wasn't very polite. I was having a chat with your friends", Dorian replied, pretty offended, dusting his clothes of invisible dirt and tidying his hair.

Goemon blushed as he noticed Eroica was upset, but he got upset himself at the mention of his "friends".

"Precisely that's the reason why I took you out. I don't approve of the way Jigen addresses you. He just met you, and cannot be so confident with you. As I was... Meditating I could not hear your conversation through my noises... My thoughts. But I know you've been talking in a rather soft tone", he was quite talkative, and quite offended.

"Is that so?", the Earl raised an eyebrow, "as far as I'm concerned, this is the second time you and I ever met. You have been very rude, both times, and still we ended up kissing on your sofa. And it worries you that I was nice with your friend who was being utterly attentive with me? Correct me if I'm wrong, but I believe that's rather incongruous and tactless".

That made Goemon blush even more. He was right. For the time being, he lacked the words to show his regret, or confidence to mark his territory more. He just gulped and made little reverence, eyes closed.

"I was wrong. I'll correct myself. Allow me to show you I can be better".

Dorian sighed. This boy was much more dramatic than he was expecting. 

He was tremendously lucky to be such a delish creature.

"Very well. Do visit me tomorrow, at the time arranged", he nodded.

"Hai", Goemon nodded as well.

"Make sure to swallow your pride before that, samurai", he said, tossing his hair back and heading for his car where his men awaited him, "I intend to show you who is in charge. Until then, farewell".

"F-farewell...", Goemon stuttered. Who was in charge? Hmm...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The moment Goemon went back in, everything was rather tense. He walked in and looked directly at Jigen, who deliberately ignored him. His cheeks went red with anger. He was almost certain that Jigen was messing with him. 

Lupin just cleared his throat and stretched.

"Aaaah well, I have something planned for tomorrow. Who's in?", he said.

"What kind of work?", Jigen mumbled.

"Just a painting that's worth around $115 million. I managed to fool the security system. Funniest part is that it's a fake!", Lupin answered, turning the TV on.

"I'm in", Jigen replied without hesitation.

"You, Goemon?", Lupin looked at him amused.

"...", tomorrow he had to meet Eroica, "at what time?".

"Mh, around midnight".

"... I cannot", he replied, blushing.

"Oooh, you have a date? At midnight?", Lupin smirked.

"I have to meet him at ten, but I was supposed to spend some time there", the samurai blushed even more and Lupin chuckled.

"It's okay, Goemon. More for us!", he slapped Jigen's arm.

That annoyed him. Why was Jigen interfering with everything? All right, maybe not interfering. But for some reason, the mere fact that Jigen existed was annoying him deeply. 

"I will go. I'll join you. I won't cancel on Eroica, I'll just leave early. Count me in", he said firmly and walked to his room. A room that he sadly shared with Jigen.

Both Lupin and the gunman looked at each other and Jigen rolled his eyes. Lupin giggled but shrugged.

"He is learning, Jigen. Let him fall and get up, he will learn from his mistakes", Lupin whispered.

"It's not him who I'm worried about...", Jigen mumbled.

Lupin looked at him for a long time. "You're learning too, Jigen. You will also fall and hit the ground hard, but you'll get up soon", he thought. But decided he'd stay quiet.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

That night, Jigen slept on the sofa just to avoid entering the room he shared with Goemon. Things were getting more and more weird.

He noticed someone had scribbled down an address on a notebook. The page had been ripped off, but the writing apparently was done by someone very tense, because the pressure of the hand on the pen left traces of the writing on the following page, and the third, even.

Jigen was curious, and used a pencil to paint above the marks. The marks stayed white and showed the address perfectly. He knew what it was. Eroica's address. He ripped the page too, and saved it in his pocket... God knows why.

The next morning he went out for breakfast early, and after that, a stroll around. He wanted to avoid Goemon as much as he could. And to keep himself calm before the great gig that night. Knowing that Goemon would leave the Earl's house early, he could visit the blonde after the assault was done. Yeah... Sounded like a plan.

He couldn't avoid meeting them forever, and so they had lunch together, replaying the plan. When it came to work, they could be agreeable. But the tense atmosphere was almost palpable.

For a moment, he felt guilty. He was being so unfair and horrible with Goemon, whom he liked and respected and appreciated so much. But then, at some point, Goemon passed by him to return to the room and deliberately hit him as he walked by. Asshole. Fuck Goemon.

Eroica was going to be his. Forget Goemon.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"What is he doing sleeping?! It's almost two o'clock!", the German voice yelled and Bonham winced.

"'e 'as a job to do tonight, 'e 'as sir!", poor Bonham excused his lordship.

"I don't give a fuck about his 'work'! Wake him up and pass him the damn phone!".

Bonham sighed. Well... He was so afraid of the Major that he indeed woke Eroica and passed him the phone.

"... I hope you have a perfect excuse to interrupt my sleeping...", Dorian mumbled on the phone, rubbing his eye, his hair a delicious, wild mess.

"Shuddup! I need your cooperation", Klaus answered, though his tone seemed to soften while explaining the reason for his phonecall.

Dorian rolled his eyes. Who on Earth did the Major think he was to call him like that, wake him and and even dare to mistreat him even while asking him for cooperation. The cheek of him!

"Is that so, darling?", he purred on the phone anyways, mellow, "whyever would Major Klaus need the cooperation of a criminal?".

"You're in Paris after some samurai's ass, aren't you? Well, you're there because I, generously, gave you the information you asked for. No?"

Oh boy... He was manipulative as heck.

"Indeed!", Eroica chuckled softly.

"Well, here's the thing, my lord", Klaus explained, calmer, "I can't go to Paris now, because I am attending to a huge issue here with Mischa. I won't go into further details, just hear me out. There is a painting, a fake painting I need to get. There's a map on the back of the canvas, with very important information about a route some trafficking of very dangerous weapons is taking. The fucking CIA required NATO's assistance because guess what, the dealers are yanks, and they are afraid to dirty their hands with the shit of their own people. So, we must clean up their mess. But, here, I am dealing with this bear who also wants the map, so the ruskies can make public this whole yank illegal business. We can't let that happen because the whole thing could end in diplomatic problems, you know how it is. So we need to get our hands on the painting first. You follow?"

Even though he just woke up, he was paying attention.

"You are trusting in me to steal it for you? Is that true?", he couldn't help grinning.

"I gave you information you needed, didn't I? You shouldn't be as immoral as to let me down", Klaus seethed.

"Darling, the simple fact that you are trusting in me so much enlivens me. You can count on me", Dorian sighed and he could hear the Major cursing.

"Hear me out, Lord Gloria. I trust you. Okay? Hear me out".

"Yes, Major...", he bit his lip. He trusted him. Klaus trusted him.

"It is a fake... But it's very expensive. VERY expensive. You MUST leave your accountant out of this. Just you and I will know. It'd be good if not even Roly Poly knew about this", he could hear a hint of panic in Klaus' voice whilst revealing such detail.

"Not even Bonham? But I do need him!", he whined.

"My Lord... You're the thief, the only thief that can make the impossible, possible. I trust you, okay? Just, you and I can know about this...", there was a pause, a gulp, shifting, and finally a sigh, "please. Just a thing between us two".

Dorian was shivering. His cheeks were blushed, like a teen girl with her first romance. The smile on his face was impossible to erase.

"Yes, Major. I won't disappoint you. Pray tell, where can I find the painting?".

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ten o'clock. He was there. The place was elegant, posh, and he felt out of place. But Eroica looked impossibly handsome, wearing light clothes in lavender tones, a delicate blouse and a scarf. The loose clothes of the top combined perfectly with the tight, white pants he was wearing. 

Goemon gulped, blushed and looked away when he noticed he was looking intensely at the Earl's bottom, as he poured some wine in two cups. This was so rare in him. But he couldn't help it.

"I almost felt you wouldn't come", Dorian said, turning and walking to sit with him on the large sofa, "but I'm happy you did".

"I said I'd come, so I did", Goemon accepted the cup but placed it on the coffee table in front of him, "However, I will leave earlier than I expected".

"How so? What happened?", Eroica frowned.

"... I have a job to do. And my partners need me", the samurai replied sharply.

"Oh... Around what time will you leave?"

"... Midnight. Just fifteen minutes before midnight".

"Oh! That gives us some time!", Eroica exclaimed and also placed his cup on the coffee table.

He then turned to Goemon, cupped his face with a hand and kissed him. The dark haired youth tensed and didn't immediately respond, but soon he surrendered to him and tried to kiss back.

This time, though, it was Dorian who leaned over Goemon, making him lay on his back, topping him.

The samurai groaned. The kiss was good, but Eroica moved too fast. Too fast, he thought, when skilled hands opened his kimono and started caressing his chest.

He liked Eroica, of course he did. But... He was so indecent. He was supposed to be HIS, but he had noticed the way he was acting with Jigen. Goemon wasn't stupid. He wouldn't tolerate that, and he didn't want to be used just as a toy for his joy and then to be abandoned so he can jump to Jigen's lap.

And what hurt the most... Jigen. Why, of all people, Jigen? Jigen was... 

Jigen was also his. He knew deep inside Jigen liked him... Back. He was just too cowardly to admit it or do something about it. 

And this man, this man comes and within minutes, he steals Jigen from his hands... Taking all his attention.

Both the men he liked the most were now unified against him. He didn't like it. He didn't like that, no.

He squirmed under Dorian's body. Those beautiful lips were kissing his chest sweetly, but he wasn't enjoying it. He turned red, suddenly blinded by anger, and pushed Eroica off him.

Dorian gasped and Goemon got up, fixing his clothes.

"What's the matter?", the Earl asked, astonished.

"I am leaving", Goemon seethed.

"But why?", Dorian felt so humiliated...

"Because! Leave me!", the samurai started walking away from him and the Earl whined. He grabbed his arm, but Goemon just turned and slapped his face.

Time stopped. Eroica grabbed his face with both hands and Goemon was shivering. He was so mad at him...

"I said, leave me! You perverted sodomite!", he yelled at Eroica and for a moment he dared to look.

Mistake. He saw those giant blue eyes, filling with tears that started falling down, wetting his hands.

Oh...

His heart pained... He winced, bit his lip and turned.

"Goodbye...", he mumbled and turned, leaving the Earl alone and crying.

The only one to blame for this... Was Jigen.


	4. Part IV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Their true feelings are exposed.
> 
> Naturally, it doesn't end well.

He cursed in French, and that made Jigen laugh. Since when did he curse in French? But he was genuinely angry, that was the worst part.

"I can't believe it... I feel like a complete idiot!", Lupin said, slamming the table.

"Do you have an idea of what could have happened...?", Jigen asked, with fake innocence, and Lupin rolled his eyes.

"Seriously, Jigen? You forgot your delicious gay friend with golden mane?", he exclaimed, theatrically sighing and batting his eyelashes.

The bearded man just growled. Yes, obviously it had to be Eroica. 

"Do you think... Goemon told him?", Jigen lifted his hat a bit to look at Lupin with curiosity.

"We'll find out. You... Don't mention a thing. Just say that you have a toothache and I'll say I met a girl and the job is cancelled for tonight. If he looks calm about it, he told Eroica. If he complains, he didn't".

"How is that?", Jigen frowned.

"Naturally, if he told Eroica about the painting and they stole it as a happy couple, Goemon will be relieved to know we won't find out any time soon. However, if he didn't and we tell him he was forced to leave Eroica earlier just to find out we cancelled it, knowing how easily he gets butt hurt, he will be mad".

"You have a point there, boss".

"Speaking of getting butt hurt, do you think that he and Ero-"

Lupin couldn't finish the phrase - thankfully. Goemon entered the apartment, looking somewhat tired and sad. Lupin and Jigen looked at each other, and back to the Asian youth, with concern and curiosity. 

It wasn't yet 11 pm, and he was back already. Lupin and Jigen heard the painting they were after got stolen that same night, nobody knew at what time exactly. And Goemon was back already.

"Goemon? Are you okay, partner?", Lupin asked.

"... I came back for the job", the samurai said slowly, carefully, measuring the words.

"Ah-uh, huh, about that, ah, we-we are cancelling it today, Goemon-chan. Jigen has a toothache and I'm out with a girl. So sorry, partner, we made you come back earlier for nothing".

Goemon sighed and walked towards his room.

"Good... I'm not in the mood for it...", and he shut the bedroom door behind him, leaving his mates in stupor.

"... He didn't tell him", Lupin whispered.

"Y-you think Eroica dumped him?", unfortunately, Jigen couldn't dissimulate the smile despite the fact that he covered his mouth.

"And what the fuck do you care if he did!? Jigen, stop that!", Lupin punched his friend's chest but the bearded guy just snorted.

"I'm out for a walk", he said, heading to the door.

"Jigen!"

"Later"

"Ji-"

But Jigen left. Lupin sighed and turned on the TV. Those two... 

And Eroica did such a wonderful job there. Using his charms to seduce the bastards, to keep them distracted so he could get his hands on the painting.

And still, Jigen didn't care. He cared more that Eroica was now free.

God. Gays were impossible!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Who's that", a crying voice could be heard on the other side of the door.

That shook Jigen up. Eroica was sad too? What could have happened?

"It's Jigen Daisuke, the..."

Before he could finish, Eroica opened the door. He was crying, and his cheek was red.

"... What happened to you?", Jigen asked, startled.

"Goemon happened to me. Whatever did I do to him to deserve this?", he whined and pointed at his cheek.

Goemon... Jigen clenched his fists as he walked in and closed the door. It was infuriating. Whatever was going on in the samurai's head, it wasn't an excuse to do this to the poor guy Eroica. 

To think that Jigen had been so crazy about Goemon. He adored him and everything he did. To think he was jealous of Eroica at first. Pah! As if such an imbecile, immature sucker like Goemon could ever deserve a man like Eroica.

Gently as never before, he lifted his hands and cupped Eroica's face. He studied the mark far more than necessary, and finally met those surprised blue eyes.

"... He is confused, Earl. He is complicated. It's not about you", and still, Jigen found ways to justify his actions, it seemed.

"... But Jigen... You have no idea what this means to me. It's not the first time I got beaten. For being, as he called me, a 'perverted sodomite'. Is it written on my faith that I shall be despised and hurt by those whom I dare to love?", Lord Gloria cried, his frown showing both pain and anger.

"What do you mean?", the gunman asked and Eroica slipped from his touch to go and sit on a sofa there.

"... I mean, the Major. The Major hates me. You have no clue what I have done for him. And still... He despises me. And beats me. And insults me and pulls my hair. For once that I feel admired, desired by someone I also like, why? Why does he do this? What did I do?!", he was sobbing.

Jigen walked towards him and sat next to him. That Major, he heard about him a lot and actually thought he had something with Eroica. Apparently not.

"Unrequited love, nh? Boy, do I know about that...", he mumbled, looking at the Earl's gorgeous curls.

Lord Gloria gulped and wiped his tears away. 

"Do you know about it, then... You do love Goemon, don't you", he sighed, not even surprised.

"Yeah... I do... But he has been a jerk lately. I don't forgive him", he again cupped the Earl's face.

Jigen was different, that was clear. He had that appearance that told he was rough and dangerous, but in truth he was soft and caring. Many things about Jigen reminded Dorian of the Major. But Klaus would never cup his face like that. Klaus would never risk his job or partnership for him. Klaus would never look at him with the worry Jigen had in his eyes. Klaus could never love a man, he could never love Dorian. Jigen loved not a man, but two. Or at least was enamoured. 

He gulped and pressed his lips against Jigen's palm, closing his eyes, and Jigen's heart skipped a beat.

"Jigen...", the Earl whispered against his palm and his warm breath gave him goosebumps, "lie to me... Please..."

The bearded man licked his lips. Poor dude... So beautiful and so miserable. He misjudged Eroica. He was a philanderer, yes, but not because he liked to play with men. It was because he was helplessly in love with a man who would never return his love. He was unsatisfied and frustrated, in pain, looking for anyone who would fill the void inside of him. 

Oh they were so similar...

"I... love you, Eroica. I will never leave you", he lied and the Earl sobbed, squeezing him into a hug.

Jigen gulped again and held him tight. He petted his soft, fluffy hair and rubbed his back. He sniffed his scent discreetly and shyly pressed his lips on his forehead.

He had to be very careful not to start believing his own lies.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He has been so rude, disrespectful and unfair.

Guilt was consuming his soul, his heart. He tried to empty his mind, but the remorseful feelings wouldn't abandon him. 

The way he slapped Eroica's face, without thinking... He knew that slap was for himself. For being so idiotic and acting like a child. Or for Jigen, too, who was playing with his feelings. But not for the Earl. He didn't do anything wrong.

Not being able to rest with how heavy his heart felt, he slipped out of the room again. 

Lupin was watching TV on the sofa, and looked up at him with interest.

"Hey, 'Gawemon', feeling better?", he asked.

"I'm going out", Goemon said, coldly.

"...", Lupin gulped, "forgive my indiscretion but where?"

"That doesn't concern you".

Uh oh. This meant nothing but problems.

"But Goemon, we haven't eaten, want me to get you some sushi?"

"I'll invite Eroica for dinner and beg if needed. I have wronged him".

"B-but...", Lupin got up on his feet.

"WHAT".

He looked annoyed and upset, so Lupin just lifted his hands, diplomatically, and pursed his lips.

"Nothing, nothing..."

And so, Goemon went out of the apartment. Lupin waited fifteen minutes before following him, carrying his gun just in case.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I have the painting for you, Major".

For some reason, even though it wasn't his usual self to trust the Earl so easily, he believed him.

"Really? Well done. You see, I can arrange some time and pick it up myself. It's dangerous for you to wander around with it, because the ruskies already found out you were stealing it".

"Oh, no!", Eroica gasped.

"Don't worry. Just hide and wait for me. Where are you staying?", Klaus yawned. He was so tired.

"Is it safe to tell you on the phone?"

"Yes. Tell me".

After writing the address and arranging the meeting, the Major yawned again.

"Alright. I'll see you in a few hours".

"A few hours? Major, it's around six pm..."

"Yes, I'll be there by midnight".

"But I...", he had something to do, right? An expected visitor.

"Mh?"

"Nothing Major. I'll be waiting for you".

"Did you have a date with your samurai...", strangely, his tone sounded annoyed.

"Yes, but I can just tell him to wait for me a minute, hand you the painting and come back".

"Hmph..."

"What, don't tell me now that just the one time I don't want to see you, you want to see me!"

"As if! See you at midnight!", and he hung up.

That was around six hours ago.

Now, it was around midnight, and Eroica had totally forgotten about Klaus.

Right now, he was holding Jigen close to him, and feeling better than ever. 

It would be wrong, perhaps, it would be dirty, but everyone knew he was lecherous by nature. And he felt sad. Slowly, he moved his face up and to the side, until his nose nuzzled Jigen's cheek. 

The bearded man gulped, noticing the soft move. He also turned his face and soon he was nose to nose with the beautiful thief.

Eroica smelled softly of roses and vaguely of a more masculine, musky scent. His hair was soft and not at all tangled; despite the curls, which seemed to be impossible to pass through, Jigen could run his fingers there over and over and they remained perfect. His eyelashes were so long, that when he was hugging Jigen he could feel how with every blink, the eyelashes caressed his skin. He was so pretty that it almost ached.

It was just a second, in which their eyes met and he knew what he had to do. He tilted his head, and kissed Dorian deeply and passionately, not a wimpy, little kiss. A rough kiss, a kiss that someone like Jigen could only give. Eroica hummed and held him closer, clearly approving of it, and they kissed for quite a long moment, which increased the need in Jigen.

He pushed Eroica atop him, forcing him to sit on his lap. It was a mess of long limbs but both seemed happy to be there. 

And then the door opened and someone came in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't know why I keep posting these


	5. Part V

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The finale.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In the end I got confused. I know nothing about guns... Jigen's gun is a Magnum? A Walther? Manga and anime confuse me.

They stopped the moment the door opened, Dorian feeling terrified. He had forgotten about the KGB and stupidly left the door unlocked. How irresponsible...

But this was -perhaps- worse.

"...", he could have complained about the fact that the person entered without knocking, but all he could do was to just climb off Jigen and wipe his mouth with a finger.

Jigen squinted and looked at the intruder with daring eyes, but the latter was shocked for the time being.

Yet finally, the whole fury of a burning forest manifested in his eyes and he looked at Dorian first.

"... I have come here to beg for your forgiveness. To ask you to be my kaishakunin, even, since I wronged you so. But I see you are as shameless as I thought you were", Goemon seethed.

"I never said I wasn't, darling", Eroica looked as defiantly, and narrowed his eyes, "and to ask me such a thing would have been just as offensive as the offense itself. Do you think I'd endure the image of you taking your life, and also of me chopping your empty head off, just for a simple slap? You amuse me, Goemon. You are definitely not the man I hoped you would be. And there is where I was mistaken, in hoping anything from you. But you are guilty of the same".

He spoke so sharply, so coldly and so maturely that Goemon felt ashamed and... More in love than ever. He turned to Jigen this time, and his jaw tensed.

"Either way, he was my interest, you should have stayed away", he said to the bearded man, who snorted.

"Tssk! Don't you know that if you don't treat your partner right, soon another will appear?", he answered, standing up.

"You had no right!", Goemon shouted, "you offended my honour! You both did! I forgive Eroica, for I have offended him too, but not you Jigen!"

"No? And what are you planning to do", Jigen smirked, taking out his box of cigarettes and putting one between his lips.

In less than two seconds, Goemon drew his Zantetsuken and cut the cigarette from Jigen's lips in two, and the latter didn't even blink. But Dorian gasped and turned pale.

"I challenge you to a duel", the samurai demanded.

"If that's what you want", Jigen dusted off his jacket, "you have it".

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

To convince the two men to fight outside took Dorian a lot of effort, bravery and determination. But they all went out, and the Earl was grateful that he sent both Bonham and James back home in England. 

He was somewhat flattered that the dispute was because of him, but he was also panicking. He would have called the police himself if he wasn't the author of the most recent famous robbery.

One of them, if not both, would end up terribly wounded or even dead, of course, and it would be all his fault.

"But, boys, there must be a more civil solution!"

"I am a man of honour and I must fight for it!", Goemon yelled.

"I just want to kick his ass, that's all", Jigen mumbled.

One carried a gun, the other a sword. From the sight of it, Goemon had the least of chances...

The duel started and Jigen drew his Magnum and shot. Before Dorian could even cover his eyes, Goemon drew his sword, yelled at the Earl to duck, and putting the sword vertical in front of him he cut the bullet in two.

Lord Gloria couldn't even pinch himself to check if he was dreaming when Goemon ran towards Jigen and lunged, but the gunman dodged it like a professional, rolled over, got on his knees and shot again.

Well these were Paris' streets... Surely someone had to stop this nightmare.

Definitely not Lord Gloria, who was gaping at the two men, hidden behind a car, mesmerized.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He was quite close when he heard the gunshots. His blood felt like iced water within his veins, and his heart felt as if it had stopped working.

It had to be them... And Eroica.

He increased his speed, sweating cooly. No, not Eroica. Please, no, not him.

It would be all his fault and he'd never forgive himself for that...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Goemon jumped over Jigen and lunged, and this time he managed to scratch his arm. Jigen hissed, but turned and shot, and the bullet scratched Goemon's cheek.

"GUYS, STOP!", Eroica started screeching.

But they went on. A car was approaching faster and faster, and another one behind it.

The first car stopped just the moment Goemon twisted and dived, and Jigen spun and tossed, so now both of them had a weapon pressing against each other's throat. Looking closely, it seemed more bullets scratched Goemon, and Jigen had cuts all over his hands, face and clothes.

"Guys, come on!", a short haired man came out of the first car, as the other car stopped nearby, "you can't be fighting like this over a dude!".

As rude as he sounded because he was worthy of a duel, Eroica couldn't agree more.

But from the second car, another man came out. This one was long haired, strongly built and handsome.

He ran towards Dorian and grabbed him by his blouse.

"ARE YOU OKAY", he yelled to his face, eyes crazy and green and cheeks flushed.

Lord Gloria looked at him astonished and nodded, and the other three men looked at him with the same surprise.

"What the fuck is going on here?!", Major Eberbach asked, suddenly aware of the rest of things aside of Eroica.

"Who the fuck are you, more like", Lupin said and the other two hummed in agreement, still threatening each other.

"I'm Klaus Heinz Von Dem Eberbach and I came to pick this wanker up", he shook Eroica a bit, "I almost shit my pants thinking the KGB killed him because you fucking assholes decided to play the Shiroyama battle".

Lupin tilted his head back and laughed loudly. The man was AWFUL but witty. 

Goemon blushed and he was the first to withdraw. He moved away and stood up straight, putting the sword back in its place. Jigen did the same.

"Pick me, Major?", Dorian asked softly.

"Yes, yes, pick you", he then lowered the voice to a soft whisper and leaned close to him, "don't tell me Bruce Lee and James Coburn were fighting over you?"

"Bruce Lee is rather Chinese and Goemon is-"

"Just answer me", Klaus rolled his eyes.

"I think so... But they have personal issues themselves".

"Okay. You be a good boy and go to my car. With the KGB after us and this fucked up performance I'm surprised we're still alone. French police, really..."

"Major, you've been impossibly xenophobic since you arrived!"

"I came to save your ass!!"

"Oh, gosh, this brings back memories of my parents' arguments!", exclaimed Lupin and Klaus growled, "but, so, Eroica, are you leaving these two just like that?"

Dorian looked at them both, Jigen squinting at Klaus and Goemon with eyes closed.

"I... Well, yes"

"WHAT?!"

Both Jigen and Goemon reacted. 

"That's outrageous, we had a duel for you!", Goemon snapped.

"I got my favourite tie cut in two and you leave just like that?", Jigen shouted.

"Not that it's my fucking problem, but you two really think someone would owe you shit if you treat them as nothing but a piece of ass? He might be an airhead wanker but he's MY airhea-... He's a grown ass man and he will decide whoever the fuck he goes with!", Klaus shouted too, blushing slightly at that little lapse.

"As if you treated him any better, you cocksure brat", Jigen bawled, looking at the Major with disgust.

"And what the fuck do you care, if he is after my ass anyways. It is HE who decides and it is I who gets his ass anyways, so sod you Pops!"

They all started yelling at each other and Lupin was giggling first and then laughing at the top of his lungs. And still not a single policeman in sight!

"SHUT UP, YOU IDIOTS!!!"

Lord Gloria's call out echoed down the deserted streets.

"I refuse to be the reason why you all fight. It's shameful and disgraceful!"

Goemon blushed and nodded, but Jigen just snorted. Klaus seemed to finally notice he had been making a fool of himself.

"I am now leaving with the Major. That is only because I have something for him, back inside the flat. But as for you, Goemon and Jigen, shame on you!"

"B-but, how could you prefer him to me?", Goemon dared to say, his pride hurt to levels unknown.

But Klaus had some pride too.

"Tell you why, oneesan...", Klaus smirked and Goemon squeezed his sword tightly, " because he is too experienced and too sexy for a virgin like you, and too young and pretty for a grandpa like your boyfriend. Only a man like me is around his standards. Kids like you are nothing but toys".

It would take just one shot, Jigen thought. One shot and Klaus would be dead. But it would be too bad for Lord Gloria. He actually liked this bastard.

"Major, I don't allow you to talk to my friends like that...", Dorian frowned but then twisted a curl around his finger, and smiled cheekily, "but you really think I'm all that?"

Klaus nodded, closing his eyes, exasperated.

"Go, bring the painting and let's get the hell outta here", the Major commanded and Dorian ran back inside.

Klaus whistled Panzerlied as he walked back to his car. Then stuck his hand in his pocket and frowned.

"Hey, Pops!", he addressed Jigen, "do you have a cigarette?"

"No but I can end your suffering with a bullet", Jigen mumbled.

"Ah, fuck you".

Lord Gloria returned with a long tube containing the painting, and a suitcase with his stuff. He gave those to the Major and went to greet his affairs.

"Boys... I am utterly ashamed of how it all turned out. Will you ever forgive me?", he said, looking at them both.

"No hard feelings, babe. You know your stuff", Jigen assured him but Goemon wasn't so sure.

"Goemon...", Dorian spoke sweetly and held his hand, "I know you've been hurt. I'm sorry for how much I disrespected you. But I sincerely hope that this whole experience serves you well, and you can see better the high quality of the man who loves you the most".

Goemon's little eyes went wide and Jigen started coughing.

"What do you mean?", the samurai asked.

"I know this whole confusion of yours was due to the feelings of guilt that being with me gave you. But you are now free to see that he is indeed the best for you, and he loves you too, dearly. This fight was not over me. It was over the love you have for each other. Jigen, Goemon... Please talk this through and embrace each other. Life is too short to waste it fighting".

Goemon pouted and nodded and Jigen greeted Eroica with his hat.

"Thank you, my lord", both said at once.

Dorian winked and then pointed at Lupin.

"Take care of them".

"I try my best but they're indomitable!".

They chuckled softly and then Dorian bowed.

"Well, then, from Eroica with love... Good luck, guys".

And he ran to the car where his Major awaited.

Lupin discreetly gave his friends some space but watched them from afar.

It was Jigen who stepped closer first.

"Did any bullet go too deep?", he asked softly, wiping some blood from Goemon's cheek.

The samurai blushed and shook his head.

"Not really but... Usually I get not even a scratch".

"Oh, I know... You're too amazing for that", he smiled at Goemon and the latter smiled back.

"You're cut all over. Let me clean up your wounds", Goemon said softly.

"Alright but only if I can clean yours".

Lupin giggled softly but looked at them with tenderness in his eyes. Christ. They were really meant for each other. Who else would tolerate them?

"LUUUUUUPIIIIIIIIN!!!" A familiar husky voice broke the spell and Lupin squeaked.

"Zenigata?!", Goemon cried out.

"To the car, both of you!", Lupin started running towards it too, "how could this happen?!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I wonder why it took the police so long to appear?", Dorian asked when they were heading to the airport.

"Ah, I told that old geezer Zenigata that Lupin and his gang were here. The police forces are surrounding the area. They just let us pass because they know we're NATO".

"MAJOR! You revealed my friends' location?", Eroica squeaked.

"Yes! They're criminals!"

"But I am too! And I happened to know they were after this painting too, that's why I took it out so early! And yet knowing I had it they did nothing to retrieve it from me!"

"They were dueling in the streets! Shuddup already!"

"Agh!"

They both mumbled curses and then remained silent for a long time.

Slowly, progressively, a smirk appeared on the Earl's face.

"Did you really mean all you said, Major?", he purred.

Klaus rolled his eyes but a traitorous smile appeared on his face.

"... The samurai, all right, I give you that. Good tits. But the hat man?", he asked, disgusted.

"Oh, Major, he is so handsome when you make a close up! And he has a Magnum, too!"

"Mine's bigger...", Klaus said.

Eroica bursted out laughing and Klaus smiled. What a relief to find out the foppish thief was safe. What a relief to hear him laugh.

What a damn relief to leave Paris so soon.

*********  
Some things:

-A kaishakunin is an appointed second whose duty is to behead one who has performed seppuku, Japanese ritual suicide, at the moment of agony.  
\- The Battle of Shiroyama was fought between the Imperial Japanese Army and the Samurai of Satsuma, in Kagoshima, Kyushu. 30,000 Imperial troops faced off against some 500 samurai.  
\- Bruce Lee was a Chinese-American actor, director, martial artist, martial arts instructor, and philosopher.  
\- James Coburn was a capable, rough-hewn leading man, whose toothy grin and lanky physique made him a perfect tough guy in numerous leading and supporting roles in westerns and action films. It is said Jigen was inspired in this actor.  
\- Oneesan is Japanese for big sister.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry this didn't have the success I hoped it would have! 
> 
> I seriously put love and effort writing it. Even though I enjoyed creating this universe, the little understanding and appreciation it had turned me down, sincerely. 
> 
> I'm not writing anymore.  
> But I hope you all keep enjoying the few works I left here. 
> 
> Much love to my readers! From Punch with love xx

**Author's Note:**

> Soooo no snog here true but I already have part 2 xD
> 
> Yes I don't know how to depict each character so perfectly but bear with me!
> 
> If you're part of the FEWL fandom and not Lupin's or vice versa, I hope you can still enjoy the story.
> 
> So much DRAMA coming!


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